"oh how's the baby..."

About a month after the birth to my stillborn little girl, my husband and I attended a wedding for one of his friends. It was the first time we had seen everyone since everything had happened, and we assumed that the one couple we had talked to would have told everyone else. I was very apparently not pregnant anymore (I should have been about 7 months along), and I made sure to wear a very "hi-I'm-skinny-again" outfit.

We'd been there for all of 15 minutes when one of my husband's friend's wives came up to me, hand moving in to touch  my belly, and said "oh how's the baby...?!" (in that really high "oh it's just so sweet" kind of voices...)

I couldn't for the life of me figure out how she didn't realize I, obviously, wasn't 7 months pregnant and I responded with a icy "I'm not pregnant" while avoiding her outstretched hand. I must have given her quite the glare too cause I later found out that she was scared of me for a good year after that.

"don't you want to have kids..."

I was at a gathering for the ladies in our church when one of the women tapped me on the shoulder and said "Can I talk to you for a second?" I thought she had something really serious that she needed to talk with me about so I stepped to the side with her. She said, "Well, I see you holding and taking care of other people's children all the time. ...don't you wanna have kids of your own?"

I had already had my first miscarriage, we didn't have health insurance, my husband was a student, and there was no way, at that time, that we could try to have kids of our own. No matter how much we wanted them. So standing there, listening to her rant on and trying to find the nearest exit, honestly, I just laughed in my head and thought, "You're kind of stupid."

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